Friday, September 5, 2008

Overwhelmed with haram

I walk into work today and I'm just completely overwhelmed, as I have been for the past week or so. There's music playing from two cubes on either side of me.... one techno and the other hip hop. Then the F-bombs come flying as soon as I come in, my neighboring coworker pops his head over the cube to ask me about something that doesn't need my approval -at all-. I just want to go back home and read a book, do something quiet.... or at least work somewhere that doesn't require me to leave my deen at the door. 

I've worked here for quite some time, and I am expected to accept others as they are... I can not ask them to watch their language or to stop talking about everything in a sexual nature, or to please refrain from reminding everyone of my drunken stories 3 years ago... because after all, it is what I did, so what's the harm in that??

Maybe I've gotten too sensitive, maybe it is my fault and I shouldn't be so jolted by it each morning when I walk in. If the economy wasn't in such a hole right now, I could look for different work quite easily, but I haven't been able to find much when I do search. I'm just getting really tired of being the only person who doesn't constantly talk about getting drunk, having sex and throwing F-bombs all over the place. It was fun to basically work in a frat house when I joined in partying, but I see now why some people do not like the environment and leave...

1 comment:

  1. Assalaamu' Alaikum habibti!
    SubhanAllah! How frustrating! All I can say is hang in there! Keep making dua for Allah to grant you a better job in a better environment! Just ignore them and remember you are aiming for Jannah! May Allah make this test easy for you! Insha'Allah you are in my dua!